well he's done it. ryan has successfully chosen horror films that "penetrate my psyche" as he put it. before last night i had never had a bad dream (that i can remember) after watching a scary movie. we watched house of 1000 corpses and evil dead last night. both were substantially screwed up in their own unique ways, but i think house of 1000 corpses wins for most screwed up movie of the evening (i have yet to determine if ryan will come through with a more horrifying film). i should have known it would take a film written and directed by rob zombie to thoroughly freak me out. i'm actually quite surprised the dream didn't involve a scary clown. if you don't know, i am scared to death of clowns. i think i'd rather eat a huge steak than be near a clown. this, i assume, is why ryan chose that movie in the first place. what a sweetheart he is.

my goal now is to recover before thursday's session of scary movies. this time it's gonna be texas chain saw massacre 2 and exorcist: beginning. i'm not too sure anything will be worse than house of 1ooo corpses. we'll see...

i've gotten absolutely nothing accomplished today. i woke up at 10, ate breakfast, talked to ma for a little while, took a shower, then went grocery shopping. i had intended to work on my social stratification mid-term when i got back from the grocery store, but i fell asleep instead. five hours of sleep just wasn't cutting it for me.

last night kate and i sat on the floor talking and being goofy from 11:30pm to 4:30am. this may sound dumb, but it was a great time. it's exactly what i needed last night. i couldn't have asked for a better roommate. i had been feeling kinda sappy (as evidenced by my last post), so she came to see if i was ok, and well... as i've already stated, we ended up talking for 5 hours. i don't know how she does it, but she always manages to make me feel one thousand times better. i think i'd go crazy if it weren't for her. i don't know what i'm going to do after we graduate...

when i got back from the grocery store i decided to lay down on the couch and watch tv for a few minutes. two hours later i woke up to the haunting. that is possibly the cheesiest "scary" movie i've ever seen, but for some reason i couldn't stop watching it. this was not the best idea, because although it wasn't scary at the time, i'm here alone til monday, and now i keep thinking i hear and see things that aren't there. i'm such a dork. i can't believe i'm admitting to the fact that the haunting has me even the slightest bit freaked out. i watched stir of echoes and texas chain saw massacre with ryan the other night and i was fine, but i'm jumpy after watching the haunting. evidently i can't handle scary movies when i'm alone. who's a nerd? yeah, me.

well it's clear that i'm feeling pretty sappy tonight... i'm listening to dido, sarah mclachlan, and john mayer...

yesterday was spec-TAC-ular. before bryan, katie, ryan, and i left for baltimore i made pancakes for everyone. it was a messy experience. i had pancake batter all over- from the counter to my jeans. they were rather good though, so it was worth it.

when we got to baltimore (without getting lost or getting a speeding ticket, surprisingly) we went to the huge barnes and noble which i translate as, "heaven". mmm... i love books! from there we went to a place called California pizza for lunch, and then to a bunch of little shops. here's a picture of me and katie in one of them...



and here's one of me and some crazy leprechaun in the hat shop...




from there we went back to the car (and paid $15 for parking! madness i tell you!), and headed to edgar allen poe's gravesite. it was awesome. i love old gravestones, and there's just something about being in a cemetery that calms me. here's a picture of poe's gravestone. the weird thing is, that green hue you see in the picture was not evident to any of us when we were there. spooky, huh?




i didn't realize how cool baltimore is before yesterday. it had been a while since i was there, and at that time i didn't notice much about it. i could definitely deal with living there if i decide to go to the university of maryland. i'm not sure if i'll be able to decide between there and boston... it's gonna be tough. either way... i'm really looking forward to getting out of pennsylvania.

so i spent 4 hours at the diner last night. crazy. i can't believe we were there til 1:30, but i had a great time. getting up for class this morning was a little rough, but it was well worth it.

this weekend promises to be a load of fun! on friday we're having a slumber party here equipped with makep-up and scary movies! (i'm so excited!) then on saturday morning, we're gonna have a (hopefully) lovely pancake breakfast before we head to baltimore for the day. (woo, baltimore!) we've been talking about going to baltimore for the past 2 years, so i'm thrilled that we're finally going. i can't wait! road trips with good friends are the best cure for cabin fever (or any other kind of "ailment" for that matter).

i've been thinking a lot about relationships lately. everybody wants one, yet most end in heartbreak. so how do you have a relationship without getting hurt or hurting the other person? and what happens when it does end? should you try to retain a friendship, or cut all ties? i really wish i had these answers. i wish i knew how to make a relationship work. i'm tired of dating. i just want to find the right guy and live happily ever after...

ah, valentine's day. the weather today was absolutely perfect for this particular holiday. i couldn't be happier with it.

i made it through the day with the aid of some lovely websites from friends who understand my hatred for the holiday. one site has wonderful e-cards that express the gloom of the day. so i sent one to ryan, who, believe it or not, hates valentine's day as much or maybe even more than i do. the unfortunate (or rather hilarious) part is that the subject line read: jess has sent you vd! classic.

on a less negative note, i spent much of the afternoon sleeping and moping around cuz my head was throbbing, and i otherwise felt pretty gross. what valentine's day would be complete without a little nausea? i do feel quite a bit better now, though. if i had to guess i'd say it's because i know this horrible holiday is almost over for another year. and tomorrow, ryan and i are going to celebrate that with 5 gay men (the queer eye guys)! it doesn't get much better than that!

goal for tonight: fall asleep before 3:30 am.

it's 2 am

it's one of those nights where i can't fall asleep because i'm thinking too much. there are so many things running through my mind tonight... ideas... worries... questions that seem to have no answers.

*sigh*... what i wouldn't give for someone to cuddle me to sleep...

ah! i hate this stupid holiday!!!!

if there is a good thing about valentine's day, this is it.

a temporary cure for boredom... enjoy! :)

what high school stereotype are you?

You scored as Punk/Rebel. Punk/Rebel 38% Prep/Jock/Cheerleader 25% Drama nerd 25% Stoner 25% Goth 19% Ghetto gangsta 13% Geek 13% Loner 6% What's Your High School Stereotype?> created with QuizFarm.com

well, it appears to be that time of year again... valentine's day. i even hate typing it. ugh. anyway, since i am bombarded by vomit-inducing valentine's day ads (ew. i wrote it again!), i've decided to share with you my favorite candy of the season. enjoy!

i need this shirt!!!! hahaha

i need a vacation... from life.

i'm so tired and yet... so restless. one minute all i want to do is sleep for 2 days, and the next i want to run about 20 miles. i've noticed a similar pattern with my contentment. some days i'm so content i'm almost to the point of complacency, but other days i find myself feeling fairly dissatisfied with my life as it is right now. i go through these phases from time to time, but i'm having a hard time getting myself out of it this time...