blah.

tired of this phase.

only a few more months.

i hope.

in case you didn't know, i have the best friends in the world.

friday night i went out to see sar. we were supposed to go to a little shin dig with some of her friends, and have some holiday "spirits" if you will. sadly, i got sick (not because of the spirits, mind you. i didn't even get that far). so instead, i spent the night laying in her bed watching nick and nite and trying not to puke... again. meanwhile, the poor girl stayed home to take care of me. she's the sweetest thing. and apparently i look like a cabbage patch doll when i'm sleeping. i think that was teeb's revelation. haha... good times.

on saturday night shell and brandon came down to hang out with me. it was so great. i haven't gotten to spend a lot of time with shell lately, cause she's been super busy. so it was awesome to have her hang out last night. she is the biggest goofity goofs. and i lovies her upies! hehe brandon's pretty great too... but ya know, i see him all the time. seriously though, they're the greatest. i'm so thankful they're in my life.

so minus being sick, i had a pretty great weekend. i have awesome friends, a wonderful family, and an adorable dog. life is good...





on a much sadder note... today is the one year anniversary of my friend, dave's death. i don't really know what to say about him... he was just an amazing person. *miss ya, dave... can't wait to see ya again*

and this is why i love my roommate...

katie patatie: we're same sex parents of a cross dressing fish
katie patatie: what does that say about america?

so it's finals week already. this semester has gone so quickly (probably because i went home just about every weekend... and the one i didn't, my bestest buddy brandon came down to visit me). it's hard to believe that in less than 6 months i will be graduating from college. it seems like just yesterday i was moving into the dorm. it's funny to think how much has changed... how much i've changed...

over the past couple of days i've become almost sad that it will soon be over. i've been concentrating so much lately on the future (with grad. school and all that), that i haven't thought much about the present... and the fact that my college days will soon come to an end. it was a great experience. i've learned so much... mostly from sociology classes (as opposed to english classes... hence the change of major)... from friends, from myself. i'm anticipating learning and growing more as life goes on, but i hope i never forget what i've learned here.

ok, enough of the soul searching (haha)... i must get back to work. i'm so apathetic right now. all i want to do is sit around eating christmas cookies and reading. *sigh* 2 more days...

good luck on finals, kids... much love...

"sometimes i don't hate but i want to
blinded by the reason i found you
it's just a feeling i get when i'm around you
can you relate to what i'm going through?
how much farther will i get?
man, i feel like such a moving target
how many times will i slip before i find it?
until then i guess i'll just keep climbing"

-thousand foot krutch "stranger"

happy birthday, scotty potty!

today someone whined about my not updating my blog in a while. so here's an update:

i'm tired of school, and i would REALLY like it to be december 15th right now... even better... MAY 15th!


on another note... i miss my buddies (and ma and pops and mags).



and now i have exceeded my mental capacity for the evening, so i'm going out to the livingroom to be a bum.

When peace, like a river, attendeth my way,
When sorrows like sea billows roll;
Whatever my lot, Thou has taught me to say,
It is well, it is well, with my soul.

It is well, with my soul...

Though Satan should buffet, though trials should come,
Let this blest assurance control,
That Christ has regarded my helpless estate,
And hath shed His own blood for my soul.

It is well, with my soul...

My sin, oh, the bliss of this glorious thought!
My sin, not in part but the whole,
Is nailed to the cross, and I bear it no more,
Praise the Lord, praise the Lord, O my soul!

i had another wonderful weekend in good old bloomsburg (well, for the most part anyway...). on thursday night i hung out with ceej and greg and watched them make apple dumplings. i was supposed to help, but well... i didn't cause i'm bum. then friday ma and i went up to marywood to visit the campus and get some information on grad. school and all that stuff. it went well. i really think i'll like the program, and the campus is really beautiful. the numerous statues of mary reminded me of the time we all went up to see one of jay's soccer games. that was a good time...

anyway... then on friday night i hung out with brandon and his buds. they are such a good time. i had a blast! i had a rough week (which continued that night for reasons i won't get into), so it was just great to kick back and laugh with them. i wish shell could've hung out with us, but she has a big test today that she had to study for. *good luck, buddy*

saturday i pretty much just stayed around the house... did a little homework... slept for a while... bummed around in general. then brandon and i went to the susquehanna valley mall before greg's hockey game. he did a little shopping, then we went to garfield's for an appetizer and dessert, and then went and met ceej at the hockey game. as we were driving to the rink, brandon missed the turn into the parking lot. so i said, "i dare you to drive through the grass". he did. and then realized there was a curb, and instead of stopping and backing up, he just went right over it. it was hilarious. i thought i was going to pee my pants! the night was a lot of fun... brought back a lot of memories...

on sunday i went to church, did a little shopping with ma, took a nap, then went to church to talk to the youth group. it was fun. i hope i get to do it again. when i got home i told ma we should get a movie. so we went down and got charlie and the chocolate factory. it was SOOOO good! we both laughed so hard. it was great.

and now i'm back in good old lancaster county (boo!). the next few weeks are probably going to be a blur, which is good and bad. i'm going to be so busy, i'm going to go out of my mind, but it will also make the time go faster... and that's a very good thing right now.

hope everyone has a great week... love to all...

i had such a great weekend. it's so good to come home and spend time with people who really understand and care about me. i've been so blessed with wonderful parents (and an equally but differently wonderful dog... haha) and friends.

friday night i just kinda relaxed and hung out with my parents. it's funny to think that, at one point in my life, i thought they were the biggest dorks. now they're two of my best friends...

saturday night brandon and i went cruising through bloomsburg like the cool kids we are. haha... it was so great. we listened to dumb music and did a little car dancing. then we went to visit his friends, carrie and michelle, who are loads of fun. after that we came back to my house and sat on the couch talking (for about 4 hours) about everything from the war on terror to relationships and just about everything in between. i honestly think that if i had a brother, he would be just like brandon. growing up i always wanted a big brother that would look out for me. i couldn't have a "real" older brother, so God gave me brandon. so beyond getting the sisters that i never thought i'd have, i got a brother too (when one of them fell in love with the crazy kid ). i'm a very lucky girl.

today i went to church, which is always good. i got to talk to miss joan for a little while. she's so encouraging. then ma and i went out to penn state lehman for the craft show and met my aunt annie, aunt susie, uncle tony, and my cousin kelly. the family thing overall is still pretty dismal, but there are good things too. i've gotten a lot closer to some of my aunts, uncles, and cousins, and i'm happy about that. gotta focus on the positive...

on that note, i'm off to bed. g'night kids... much love...

i really have no words for this... but i had to share anyway...

mark: s;s;s;s;s;s;s;s;s;s;s;s;s;s;s;s;s
BuTtErFlYcHiK84: ?
mark: it was fun
BuTtErFlYcHiK84: what was it?
mark: try two letters
BuTtErFlYcHiK84: hahahaha
BuTtErFlYcHiK84: you are the biggest dork
mark: cncncncncncncncncncn
BuTtErFlYcHiK84: oh my soul
mark: it can look cool if you pick the right letters
BuTtErFlYcHiK84: more evidence that you were called to be a youth leader
mark: cpcpcpcpcpcpcpcpcpcpcpcpcpcpcpcp

so it's been a while...

all i really have to say is, thank heaven for good friends and the knowledge that no matter what, i'm gonna be ok...


so many questions... so few answers...


someday it will all be clear...

Psalm 20

1GOD answer you on the day you crash,
The name God--of-Jacob put you out of harm's reach,
2Send reinforcements from Holy Hill,
Dispatch from Zion fresh supplies,
3Exclaim over your offerings,
Celebrate your sacrifices,
4Give you what your heart desires,
Accomplish your plans.

5When you win, we plan to raise the roof
and lead the parade with our banners.
May all your wishes come true!

6That clinches it--help's coming,
an answer's on the way,
everything's going to work out.

7See those people polishing their chariots,
and those others grooming their horses?
But we're making garlands for GOD our God.
8The chariots will rust,
those horses pull up lame--
and we'll be on our feet, standing tall.

9Make the king a winner, GOD;
the day we call, give us your answer.

i have the best friends ever...

Bslong034: you and i
Bslong034: i think were bro and sister in heaven before God sent us down



i'm so blessed...

Psalm 31

14Desperate, I throw myself on you:
you are my God!
15Hour by hour I place my days in your hand,
safe from the hands out to get me.
16Warm me, your servant, with a smile;
save me because you love me.
17Don't embarrass me by not showing up;
I've given you plenty of notice.
Embarrass the wicked, stand them up,
leave them stupidly shaking their heads
as they drift down to hell.
18Gag those loudmouthed liars
who heckle me, your follower,
with jeers and catcalls.

19What a stack of blessing you have piled up
for those who worship you,
Ready and waiting for all who run to you
to escape an unkind world.
20You hide them safely away
from the opposition.
As you slam the door on those oily, mocking faces,
you silence the poisonous gossip.
21Blessed GOD!
His love is the wonder of the world.
Trapped by a siege, 22I panicked.
"Out of sight, out of mind," I said.
But you heard me say it,
you heard and listened.

23Love GOD, all you saints;
GOD takes care of all who stay close to him,
But he pays back in full
those arrogant enough to go it alone.

24Be brave. Be strong. Don't give up.
Expect GOD to get here soon.

On Purpose

When a cowboy applied for an insurance policy, the agent asked, "Have you ever had any accidents?" After a moment's reflection, the applicant responded, "Nope, but a bronc did kick in two of my ribs last summer, and a couple of years ago a rattlesnake bit me on the ankle."

"Wouldn't you call those accidents?" replied the puzzled agent. "Naw," the cowboy said, "they did it on purpose!"

That story reminds me of the biblical truth that there are no accidents in the lives of God's children. In today's Scripture (Gen. 50: 15-21), we read how Joseph interpreted a difficult experience that had seemed like a great calamity. He had been thrown into a pit and then sold as a slave. This was a great test of his faith, and from the human standpoint it appeared to be a tragic case of injustice, not a providential means of blessing. But Joseph later learned that "God meant it for good" (Gen. 50:20).

Are you passing through the deep waters of a trial and disappointment? Does everything seem to be going against you? These apparent misfortunes are not accidents. The Lord allows such things for a blessed purpose. So patiently trust Him. If you know the Lord, someday you will praise Him for it all!

-Richard DeHann

* from Our Daily Bread

Psalm 25

To you, O LORD, I lift up my soul;
2 in you I trust, O my God. Do not let me be put to shame, nor let my enemies triumph over me.
3 No one whose hope is in you will ever be put to shame, but they will be put to shame who are treacherous without excuse.
4 Show me your ways, O LORD, teach me your paths;
5 guide me in your truth and teach me, for you are God my Savior, and my hope is in you all day long.
6 Remember, O LORD, your great mercy and love, for they are from of old.
7 Remember not the sins of my youth and my rebellious ways; according to your love remember me, for you are good, O LORD.
8 Good and upright is the LORD; therefore he instructs sinners in his ways.
9 He guides the humble in what is right and teaches them his way.
10 All the ways of the LORD are loving and faithful for those who keep the demands of his covenant.
11 For the sake of your name, O LORD, forgive my iniquity, though it is great.
12 Who, then, is the man that fears the LORD ? He will instruct him in the way chosen for him.
13 He will spend his days in prosperity, and his descendants will inherit the land.
14 The LORD confides in those who fear him; he makes his covenant known to them.
15 My eyes are ever on the LORD, for only he will release my feet from the snare.
16 Turn to me and be gracious to me, for I am lonely and afflicted.
17 The troubles of my heart have multiplied; free me from my anguish.
18 Look upon my affliction and my distress and take away all my sins.
19 See how my enemies have increased and how fiercely they hate me!
20 Guard my life and rescue me; let me not be put to shame, for I take refuge in you.
21 May integrity and uprightness protect me, because my hope is in you.
22 Redeem Israel, O God, from all their troubles!

i have never felt more stupid in all my life.


i don't know how to fix it...

i am the biggest dork.

so it's after midnight, and i'm trying to go to sleep cause i have a class at 8 tomorrow morning. but i can't sleep. why you ask? cause i can't stop thinking about the silly bloomsburg fair. i'm so stinking excited to go home this weekend and eat all the wonderful fair food. mmmmmm...

there's just something about the fair. granted, it's exactly the same from year to year, but somehow it never gets old. maybe that's what makes it special... it's just like bloomsburg... always the same... there aren't too many things in this world that are unchanging, but the bloomsburg fair (as well as bloomsburg in general) comes pretty close. i have such great memories of the fair from the time i was really little to even last year. i remember my parents taking me to see all the animals when i was really young, and i remember my grandmother coming with us one year, and of course there are all the times i went in high school. i can't believe we used to go every day. oh man, we were such nerds. hopefully i'll create equally wonderful memories this year...

g'night kids... much love...

I HATE THIS BLASTED APARTMENT!!!!!!!

i cannot wait to move out... only 8 more months...





(i don't have the energy to explain... if you're that curious, read katie's blog)