i just started reading the irresistible revolution, by shane claiborne. it's fantastic. this guy and his friends are doing all they can to change church as we know it, and i must say, i'm thrilled. i'm tempted to head down to philly to help them out.

here's my favorite part so far...

"I developed the spiritual form of it [bulimia] where i did my devotions, read all the new Christian books and saw the Christian movies, and then vomited information up to friends, small groups, and pastors. But it had never had the chance to digest. I had gorged myself on all the products of the Christian industrial complex but was spiritually starving to death. I was marked by an overconsumptive but malnourished spirituality, suffocated by Christianity but thirsty for God".

i can't tell you how many times i've felt just like that...

there is hope...

time to whine...

my apartment is freakin' freezing!!! AND i have no one to cuddle with to keep me warm.

i started field placement late (which, by the way, was not my fault in any way), so now i'm beind on my hours, and i'm probably going to have to do 2 extra weeks after the semester is over. ARGH!


time to be positive...

i only have 1 class tomorrow, and then i'm going to lunch with the girls from school.

cj and i (and perhaps others) are going to do something fun for halloween this weekend! wee!

i have wonderful friends, and even though i don't get to see them as often as i'd like, they're always in my heart (there's no way to say that without sounding sappy).


"there is a time for everything, and a season for every activity under heaven..."

northeastern pa=bleh... southern pa=weee!


i had a FANTASTIC time with the kateness this weekend! i'm so incredibly sad that we don't live closer to each other. no one around here understands the ridiculous things that come out of my mouth when i'm tired, or why i dance when i like certain food (or when there's a song in my head). she's spectacular, and i heart her very much. hehe

the weekend was somewhat bittersweet, though. i had so much fun, but i kept thinking that i was only going to be there for a short time, and i still have quite a long time to go before i can go back for good. i can't wait for that day...

in the meantime, i don't really know what to do with myself. i constantly feel like i'm waiting for my life to start. i really don't enjoy that feeling, and i wish i knew how to make it go away. ugh... i feel old...

he's been home for years....



we haven't been 'together' for years...


but thinking about what he went through-what we both went through-what millions of others are going through- still makes me cry...



nothing good comes from war...


cultivate peace...

so bored!

i'm currently "working" at catholic social services. for the past 3 hours, i've had just about nothing to do. i did some homework, but there's not much i can do here. i'm so tired, and frustrated that i can't be at home working on the paper that's due on thursday (or taking a nap... haha). it's a bunch of silliness i tell you!

blah. i guess i'm finished complaining now.


on a happier note... i'm gonna be in lancaster this weekend!!!! i finally get to see my kateness!!! it's been way, way too long!

by the way, if anybody's free friday night, let me know.

1 more day down... at least 208 to go...





*sigh*

i wanna have a halloween party!


who wants to come???

from My Utmost for His Highest by oswald chambers…

By Spiritual Confusion

“Ye know not what ye ask.” Matthew 20:22.
There are times in spiritual life when there is confusion, and it is no way out to say that there ought not to be confusion. It is not a question of right and wrong, but a question of God taking you by a way which in the meantime you do not understand, and it is only by going through the confusion that you will get at what God wants.
The Shrouding of His Friendship. Luke 11:5-8. Jesus gave the illustration of the man who looked as if he did not care for his friend, and He said that that is how the Heavenly Father will appear to you at times. You will think He is an unkind friend, but remember He is not; the time will come when everything will be explained. There is a cloud on the friendship of the heart, and often even love itself has to wait in pain and tears for the blessing of fuller communion. When God looks completely shrouded, will you hang on in confidence in Him?
The Shadow on His Fatherhood. Luke 11:11-13. Jesus says there are times when your Father will appear as if He were an unnatural father, as if He were callous and indifferent, but remember He is not; I have told you—“Everyone that asketh receiveth.” If there is a shadow on the face of the Father just now, hang onto it that He will ultimately give His clear revealing and justify Himself in all that He permitted.
The Strangeness of His Faithfulness. Luke 18:1-8. “When the Son of Man cometh, shall He find faith on the earth?” Will He find the faith which banks on Him in spite of the confusion? Stand off in faith believing that what Jesus said is true, though in the meantime you do not understand what God is doing. He has bigger issues at stake than the particular things you ask.


whoa…

the other day i heard someone say that the moment you begin to think nothing exciting is ever going to happen to you, that's when it does.







they lied.

i love school.

i sound like such a big nerd, but i am absolutely thrilled to be back in school. i began to feel like i would never think again. it's such a fantastic feeling to be involved in intellectual discussions. hooray for academia! hehe

speaking of reasons to say, "hooray!"... the kateness is coming up to see me tomorrow!!!! it's been quite a long time since we've seen eachother, so i'm very excited! i think we're gonna go over to clarks summit for a little while, then maybe to old forge for pizza. we'll probably end the evening by watching a silly movie and drinking some girly wine. woo!

and... now i've run out of things to say...

g'night, kiddos. :)

man, i miss those mountains.

well, i'm back in the east...

colorado was absolutely amazing. boulder is my new favorite city. the people there are so laid back, open minded, and healthy. i absolutely loved it. i'm already looking forward to my next trip out there, whenever that will be.

the scenery, of course, was indescribable. here are some pictures, but trust me, they don't do those beautiful mountains justice...




this picture is of my mother (the one with the 'antlers'), my aunt susie, and my uncle tony (the one making the 'antlers') on a trail along boulder creek


this is one of many views from rocky mtn. national park in estes park, colorado

this is the local elk herd in estes park (this is what they call a "nursery herd"-- the fawns and mothers are separated from the rest of the herd. the fawns are about the size of an adult white tail deer). we were so close to them. it was absolutely amazing. they are such beautiful creatures!

and this is the town hall in nederland, colorado (about 17 miles from boulder), where my cousin cindy lived when she first moved to colorado. it's not a big town (as you may have guessed), but it's full of charm and friendly people. visit if you ever get the chance.

there ya have it... just a glimpse into the wonderful west. :)

and now it's back to reality... classes start in 2 weeks... hard to believe...

me - lancaster =

it is amazing how much i miss that place today. i keep thinking about the market, and square one, and the random places i used to drive to just to clear my head. i'm determined to get back there after grad. school. i hope that's where life takes me, cause that's really where i want to be. it's funny to think that just a few years ago, i hated being there. this was due to the fact that it takes me a great deal of time to adjust to anything new, and i was homesick. it took a while, but eventually i fell in love with the place. it has become home to me, and i'm definitely homesick...

B.O.R.E.D.


school cannot start soon enough! i've spent the past month rotting away in front of the television. i can be sure that my brain has shrunk because of this. it may sound crazy, but i cannot wait to start classes. i'm just hoping i enjoy them at least half as much as i enjoyed my classes at millersville (ah, millersville... i miss it already *sniff*).

luckily, in a couple weeks i will have reason to tear myself away from the tv. my cousin is getting married in boulder, colorado, and some members of my mother's family (including my immediate family) are trekking out there for the event. cindy (my cousin) and david (her fiance) are having the ceremony on some sort of plateau type place in the rocky mountains. it promises to be rather beautiful. most of us are planning to be out there for about a week. we plan to do a lot of hiking and sight-seeing. cindy and david are convinced that i'm going to want to stay, and from the way describe it, i think they're right. it sounds like my kind of place. they say that most of the people out there are modern-day hippies, and boulder is full of coffee houses, book stores, and art exhibits. my parents may have to come up with a way to trick me into getting on the plane to come home. it will be so good to get a new perspective... especially right before beginning a new chapter in my life.

i can't wait to get out there...

thought for the day...

"Every noble work is at first impossible."
-Thomas Carlyle

lyric of the moment...

they say we've been looking for illegal immigrants
can we check your car
i say you know it's funny
i think we were on the same boat back in 1694

-indigo girls "shame on you"



so i've been a college graduate for almost a month now, and i'm still not sure i know how i feel about it. i'm not sure i'm ready to grow up, but i have no choice. life is changing a mile a minute, and i'm not doing a very good job of keeping up with it.

i'm not fond of friends being far away. my biggest wish at the moment is that all the people i love could be in the same place at the same time... all the time. i'm always hesitant about making new friends, probably cause i'm not very good at it, and there have been very few times in my life that i've met someone new and they turned out to be a really great friend. that makes the friends i have special though. i just wish they were closer.

it's funny... i want everyone to stay in the area (and others to move to it), and all the while i'm thinking about where i'm going to be in 2 years. at this point i have no idea. i could be across the country... or in another one. who knows. the thought both excites and terrifies me at the same time. i don't like change, but at the same time, i like knowing that there are more adventures out there for me. my life is such a dichotomy sometimes.

so this is my last night in this dreadful apartment. woo!!!

as much as i'm not going to miss this place, i am going to miss all the late night chats and lazy afternoons of watching food network with the roommate. i'm sure we haven't had our last late night chat or our last afternoon of food network, but things certainly won't be the same anymore. i'm really gonna miss millersville too. i feel like i just got settled, and now i'm leaving. it really doesn't help that i'm moving to scranton, or as i like to call it, the armpit of pennsylvania. i wish i was excited about moving on to the next phase of my life, but instead i'm kinda terrified. *sigh* i am so bad at change...

song for the day...

Attention! Attention!
May I have all your eyes and ears to the front of the room,
If only, if only for one second
Will you hear what I have to say?
Oh, did I mention when I see you it stings like hell?
To the fact that we could have something that'll never happen.
This table has taken a turn for the worst,
Rock bottom and over the edge
Well it’s not like it hurts that much anyway.
Upside-down and inside-out,
When I leave here I’m going alone
Well it’s not like, not like it, hurts much anyway.
Attention! Attention!
May I have all your eyes and ears to the front of the room,
If only, if only for one second.
Will you hear what I have to say?
Oh, did I mention when I see you it stings like hell?
To the fact that we could have something, something…
This balance has weighed out our heart’s desire,
I’m trying to make it alone.
Well it’s not like it hurts that much anyway.
Upside-down and inside out,
When I leave here I’m going alone
But I’m dying, I’m dying, to touch..’
And it’s not like it, not like it hurts much anyway.
Attention! Attention!
May I have all your eyes and ears to the front of the room,
If only, if only for one second.
Will you hear what I have to say?
Oh, did I mention when I see you it stings like hell?
To the fact that we could have something that’ll never happen.
Did you hear what I have to (say)….
Attention Attention
Upside-down and inside-out
Attention Attention
Upside-down and inside-out
Attention! Attention!
May I have all your eyes and ears to the front of the room,
If only, if only for one second.
Will you hear what I have to say?
Oh, did I mention when I see you it stings like hell?
To the fact that we could have something that’ll never happen.
Did you hear what I have to (say)...

-The Academy Is... "Attention"

i am now a college graduate!!! :)





so excited about marywood...




but i'm really gonna miss millersville...

i'm so tired...



i have a million things on my mind...


i'm frustrated... and i'm sad... but most of all...



i'm so tired...